Nov

20

Calamity Chin

Filed Under Family Chronicles 

Every time I get anywhere near pots and pans, it’s almost as though I lose 50 IQ points. Everything looks scary and strange in the kitchen, and I feel like making the sign of the cross on those rare occasions when I have to touch a frying pan. So does the husband, who’s tired of having to treat my burns or mop up after my mess.

I’m such a horrid cook I can only do one dish particularly well – scrambled eggs.

I have been mocked over this, subtly by the girls and not so subtly by the husband. The grandmothers think my ineptitude in the kitchen is a serious liability. “You’ll never find a man who’ll marry you if you don’t learn to cook,” Lola D used to say every time she catches me running away from the pan. She caught me often because I did a lot of running.

But well, I’m married now – to a man, thank heavens! I suppose that he can put up with my kitchen calamities is as good a sign as any that I am loved. I used to be deathly scared of sputtering oil in frying pans. I still am. That hissing sound you hear when you put fish, beef loaf, chicken, and just about anything else on a pan with heated oil? That sound gives me the heebiejeebies, and makes me fear for my life. What if a scalding hot chunk of meat would pop out of the pan and land smackdab on my face? What if the pan itself gets so hot it’d explode and hurtle from the  stove to where I am?

I know there are a few things I’m good at. But, there are so few of them they don’t justify the fact that I’m HORRIBLE at the things I can’t do, like cooking. And when I tell you horrible, I mean calamitous to the level where people could be in danger and equipment will explode.

Comments

5 Responses to “Calamity Chin”

  1. Frances Cabahug on July 7th, 2009 10:05 pm

    I used to solve my cooking problems by blending everything. Smoothies as meals.

    I need to find myself a husband who can cook, haha. Just kidding. For some time I’ve been slowly learning to experiment with food. It helps that I just think of it as playing! :)

    Cheers,
    Frances Cabahug

  2. mai on July 7th, 2009 11:29 pm

    hahahahha… that’s the reason why there are men out there who can coook.. to compensate for the lack of kitchen skills. don’t worry chin, that’s normal.. lol..

  3. Iris on July 7th, 2009 11:35 pm

    I’m the exact opposite. I LOVE cooking! The only problem is cooking doesn’t love me, so Steve and the rest of my family make it a point to ban me from the stove. :-p

    I can make you bola-bola – you like? ;-)

  4. Wett on July 8th, 2009 2:10 am

    But hey, she is good in everything else. *wink*

  5. konsuy on July 8th, 2009 11:00 pm

    appear kaayo ta chin. thank god for husbands who cook.